It
is with a sad, confused state of mind that I write you this, and seriously I
need your advice. My name is Omotinuolawa, am 29 years. I have lived in Lagos
for the most part of my life. My first experience outside Lagos came during my
higher institution days when I got admission to University of Portharcourt. It
was fun-filled and great both academically and romantically as I was seriously
in a relationship with a guy though not Yoruba like myself rather an Ijaw. The
relationship started ever before I gained admission into the University and it
lasted throughout my university days, I noticed that during my NYSC year I
stated experiencing some changes in my boyfriend’s attitude towards me, but
never took it serious but it later dawned on me when I finally told my parents
about the person I was dating, and they stood their ground that I can’t get
married to anyone who is not a Yoruba. At first, I had taken it as a mild
threat but the events that followed which almost destroyed the loving
relationship I shared with my parents made me realize that I had no choice than
to move on.
As
God will have his way, I met a Yoruba guy who was ready to settle down;
financially; he is okay, but the age difference between us is a whopping eleven
years. I was convinced that the age gap would be a positive thing to the
relationship as he is older, more mature and experienced which am convinced
would make him take good care of me and show a greater depth of understanding.
Sincerely, with the little time we spent together, I was convinced that I could
come to love him more than the way I cherished my first love. So, I took him
home and thank God my parents accepted him, before I knew what is going on I
found myself pregnant and that speeded up the relationship and we decided to
settle down.
Reader,
during the short courtship, I asked about his last relationship which he told
me had ended as the lady refused to come home {Nigeria} with him, as such, he
had no choice but to move on with his life, a story I swallowed hook, line and
sinker. We got married. Our life was happy. The birth of our baby added more
joys and with I also got lucky with a job. Never for once did I suspect my
husband as I never doubted the sincerity of our hearts, but I don’t know what
happened that I went through his phone only to find different kinds of text
messages which revealed that the so-called ex-girlfriend is now back in Nigeria
and that they have been seeing each other, lodging in one hotel after the other.
The message that hurt me the most was one that detailed the hotel they will be
logding in Abuja. As I write, my husband never knew that I have seen all these
text messages, sincerely, I understand if my husband still have feelings for
the girl because they dated for over 20 years, according to him, she was his
first love.
I
am scared my marriage is less than two years and with a child, I don’t want to
lose my husband, please what do you think I should do?
9 comments:
At this point all you need to do is pray and put ur trust in the lord.
The best tin for the woman is to stop pressing on the matter bcos it will hurt her the more. The simple thing is dat she has to endure a little more for the husband to make his decisions, bcos it is not easy to let a 20years old relationship to sleep by, nevertheless, at this point in time, the woman needs to be more careful not to offend her husband bcos has a Man, he can take dat as an excuse. Lastly, her needs prays to quench all the works of evil in her marriage. Advice to woman- Don't always scroll thru the husband fone bcos u might see what u can't bear without knowing the reason-its might cause HyperTension #MickyWestCares
Westy nah becos u be man if na ur wife u go fit dey wait for her patiently,Wooooh the bible say its only the violence that take's it by force.Did he not see the 20yrs marraige before he married her. Sis abeg go clam go pray oooh. U really need God intervension. In dis situation.
Well at this point she needs to ask 4 mercy 4rm God she made some mistakes 1. By sleeping with d guy outside marriage,2. She got pregnant outside wedlock,3 There was nothing like courtship btw them, if there was she would have noticed or she had seen d hand writing on d wall but ignored it. My advice is to seek God's face and she should not quarrel with her husband, 4 give him and show him love.
Mr westobo I concur with you all the way, though I couldn't open the site bouqui sent but base on ur response, I agree to the fact that women are never cool headed when it comes to marriage, so whatever the consequence they (women) should bear and play along ;)
Licia stitches you just dey form woman ni joor
Men too greedy,Dey hardly stay wit one woman plus concubines Dey r nt contented wit wat dey av @ home,D woman shld go to d hotel room n catch dem red handed. Den she shld go go quietly n pretend dt all is well. She shld agrue wit d man sef
Haaaa bad adviser go and catch them ke,In d hotel and go back home pretending - haaba lily u fit do so..
Yes na. Make she welcome am we'll wen he comes home n giv him beta fud
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